If you’ve been following the Good Success 7-Day Marriage Challenge since we began on February 8, 2020, then we’re so glad to have you along. If not, please join us now! It’s our mission to make this Valentine’s Day so much more than just another “Hallmark holiday” both for ourselves and for our Good Success community.
As part of this challenge, Becky, my wife, and I challenged ourselves to create a series of 7 videos talking about things that we have found work and do not work in our own marriage. On Day 3 of recording these videos, we discovered that two of the simplest things we make a point of doing in our marriage and in our home have been incredibly impactful for each other even though we had never formally discussed them.
The first thing is something that we always do: tell our spouse we love them. Every day, I say, “I love you,” to Becky, and every day, she says the same to me. What I did not realize was how very important those three words are to her. In fact, on Day 3, her tip for a long, loving, lasting marriage was just that simple: tell your spouse you love them! This is particularly important if words of affirmation are important to your spouse, but you should say them anyway just because, as Becky said, “People are hungry for love, so we should share the fact that we love them and never take anybody for granted. Life is short.”
Yes, she’s brilliant, and I’m not just saying that because she’s my wife! I’m saying it because most people want to be told they are loved and, be honest, you know you should tell the ones you love that you love them, but most of us will not just state that fact so obviously. We are too proud to just tell our spouse what we need. One of the things I love about Becky is that she is not only willing to state what we all need to hear from our spouses, but she also lives that mandate in our marriage each and every day. She never lets a day pass without telling me she loves me.
In the video, I laughed about this tip at first. After all, saying “I love you” is not really earth-shattering, right? Well, it can be! And not saying it can definitely be a punch in the gut to the person who needs to hear it. A lot of people did not grow up hearing their parents say they loved each other, and so they do not necessarily realize they are leaving these words out in their own marriage. If you are not sure if you have told your spouse you love them today, then go do it right now!
Of course, that was just Becky’s tip (and now, you have my thoughts on it too). For some contrast, my tip was something you should never do in your marriage, and you can watch the video about it in our Facebook Playlist, “Good Success 7-Day Marriage Challenge,” which you can find here.